Things you learn while being "handicapped"

On November 12, 2014, I had a bunion removed.

Sexy, right?

They are very hereditary and my paternal grandmother is 100% to blame for them... and for my poor daughter's toes that will need major reconstruction several years down the road.

For FOUR weeks post- op, I could not put any weight on my left foot at all.

Try walking on crutches in snow....

With vertigo....

While thinking you can still do everything with just one foot.

It was interesting because I couldn't do a darn thing without falling.  Stairs were evil, doors turned into monsters reaching out to get me, and EVERYTHING my kids left on the floor became ROUS's (rodents of unusual size for those who have not had the pleasure to memorize "The Princess Bride").

For those that are not in the hunting know, November 12 is 3 days before opening day for shot gun hunting deer.  Which means I was left to the mercy of my kiddos for a full week.

I can't say that my hubby left in bad hands, though.  I was yelled at all the time to sit down and stop working on something... so I finished Ayleen's Christmas Stocking in all of my free time.

On November 17th, I called up hubs and begged him to look for a scooter for me.  He graciously picked one up and brought it home for me that night.  Who ever invented those knee scooters deserves a HUGE hug from me.  They are a life saver.... literally.... I would have fallen and died several times if it weren't for my wheels.  I'm that clumsy.

After those four weeks were up, I had to break out the crutches again because I became slowly  more weight bearing.  It took an additional four more weeks for me to be able to 100% walk on both of my feet again.

For those of you that have never had the opportunity be less capable then you are now with 2 working arms and two working legs and feet, let me tell you... things are not as easy as what people who do without for their lives make it appear to be.

Here is a list of what I have learned while not having the full use of my foot.

1. It is OK to accept help even if you don't want it because as you become more capable less help will come your way.

2.  Handicap ramps are not as abundant as they should be and more often than not, located in terrible areas.

3. Snow and slush and ice and rain puddles SUCK.  Most side walks get cleared and iced- parking lots not so much.

4.  Elevators are AWESOME when they are not clear on the other side of the building.

5. A house doesn't have to be cleaned every day and a laundry room can look like a tornado while still kicking out clean clothes.

6.  Doors are MONSTERS! A lot of public places do not have push button open doors and amazingly difficult to open/ close with any sort of grace.

7.  The general public is not as nice as I would have hoped.  I couldn't believe how many people wouldn't move to make it easier for me to get through a place.

8.  Grocery shopping with crutches is IMPOSSIBLE.  How in the world are you supposed to walk and push a cart?  Sure, I could have ridden in an electric cart, but that would have meant I needed help, I am stubborn, and do not need help.

9.  I needed help.  With just about everything.  My kids picked out my clothes so I wouldn't have to go up and down the stairs to get them.  They also cooked meals for me and made me lunches.  They did laundry and their chores most of the time so that our animals were fed and we could eat off of clean dishes.

10.  As awesome as those knee carts are, they are a pain in the ass when trying to get in and out of a car and the house that has steps at every entrance.  You can, however, still dance with them as long as your husband doesn't mind swaying you back and forth while the walker hits both of his feet.

11.  It is amazing how fast a person can adapt to change.  It took me a while, but by the end of the four weeks, I was cooking meals, picking up the house, getting in and out of the house without denting my car and without falling.  Doors were no longer monsters, and even though the ROUSs still existed, I was able to move them to the fire pits faster so they no longer became a threat.

And last but not least:

12.  There are not enough people out there that understand what it is like to be less capable than normal and therefore not enough people to make the positive changes that should happen... like easier doors, better equipment to move with (crutches SUCK), and more conveniently located ramps for all to use, not just the car that parks in front of them.

I'm happy to announce that I can walk like my old self again.  I would, however, caution against rollerskating 7 weeks post op from a foot surgery... it kinda hurts.

I would, however, also like to say that head banging at a Skillet rock concert is a go as long as your kids are there to hold onto so the vertigo doesn't knock you on your butt.