Several things were going through my mind tonight as I was driving home from watching a movie with my favorite son:
1st- I am happy. Have you ever been so happy and content with the way your life is going that you are scared beyond imagination that something out of nowhere is going to come along and ruin it for you? That is how I am right now.
God has been doing some amazing things in our lives lately and I truly wonder if it is because we are telling Him yes more?
For example... Ted, my hard working, wonderfully loving husband, made a big leap three weeks ago and quit a job he has had since December 2008 and accepted a position with another company. Sure, that other company offered him a nice raise and day shift, but making a change is super scary, I don't care how manly you are. And the verdict after three weeks? He LOVES it! He is treated great, people there respect him, he is learning new things, and is able to teach younger mechanics which is something he enjoys doing.
They value him.
As a wife, I can't tell you how amazing it is to know that your husband is working for a company that truly values his work effort and isn't afraid to show and tell him.
Is it perfect? No, of course not. He works 10 plus hour days and on Saturdays, but I have been so used to him being on second shift that I truly treasure the couple of hours we get in the evening together. (Even if it is usually just sitting and watching TV together.)
2nd- I did something and am doing new things and loving the experiences from it. The last weekend of July, the kids and I participated in the American Cancer Society's Relay for Life. We were able to camp out on the high school football field and meet a ton of new friends all while raising money to support the ACS. This event open up numerous doors for me to talk with my kids about life and death. How cancer doesn't just take old people, but that sadly, it also takes young ones. They were able to see for themselves the luminary's lit up and surrounding the track. Each one decorated in memory of or in honor of someone who has gone through and possibly still going through, cancer.
Of course, it wasn't an entirely serious event. Each hour was themed and in the morning was "character hour" where you dressed as your favorite movie character. Wouldn't you know that two Storm Troopers, one dark knight lord, and Hans Solo were walking that hour. So, the shy person that I am, asked a storm trooper to wake up my sleeping Padawan. He did. I wish I would have taken a picture of Christian's face as he opened his eyes to see a storm trooper staring at him and telling him to get out of bed! It is truly an image I will never forget.
3rd: Have you ever wanted to get rid of an animal because they could not get trained? I have. Bella. I love her and all, but that girl must have the smallest beagle bladder in the world. It's either that, or we don't wake up in the middle of the night when she needs to go out. Plus, she barks. Ok, I know she is a beagle and is supposed to bark at SOME things, but I swear she is ADHD because she will be barking at one thing, stop, then run in a different direction and bark at that. I just don;t get it.
Bella and Alyssa are so similar, it's not even funny. The biggest difference is that Alyssa is fully housebroke :-) But seriously, there have been several moments where I truly wished there was a place to drop a kid off at, even for just a few hours, to get a break. I know... that place is school, but school doesn't start for three more weeks, and even then, she does go to a friend's house while we are at work. At the end of the day, when Alyssa and Bella are all calmed down, is my favorite time. We all cuddle together, read a book and truly enjoy each other's company. Do I think I think I am bad mom for having these feelings? Once in awhile, I do. But that is when I remind myself that I am truly just human. That God is still working on me and Alyssa. And that HE loves both of us unconditionally, which is amazing in and of itself.
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